and so.....................

people are always asking me what i do with myself since i've retired. hmmmmmmmmmmm!
wish i could say that i've started volunteering at the local soup kitchen or that i've joined the gym and
work out on a regular basis etc. sorry my life has not changed all that much. the exception being, is that i no longer go to the office. instead, i concentrate on what makes me happy. selfish? yea! do i care? no! (i'm selfish remember).
i have been spending alot of time in my garden. this makes me happy. a garden is like a painting or a sculpture. mixing your colours and your shapes and textures to create something that is pleasing to the eye. i long for a secret garden. (do you remember the book?) a place where you can go and be alone where no-one knows where you are, where flowers and shrubs and trees are allowed to run wild. i am working on such a garden but it will take me years to pull it off.    this makes me happy.
it's dragon boating season again so i'm on the water a couple of times a week and i love it! my team mates are  a great group of women and several have become good friends. this year, the daughter has joined up! she is at the moment dividing herself between the teen team and sparing for my team. paddling together is just one more thing that we can share.    this makes me happy.
i have more time to spend with my grandchildren. they are at an age that they grow so fast and every week there is a change so i am lucky to be able to see this happen right before my eyes. they make me laugh. i see my son become an amazing father.    this makes me happy.
i am able to spend more time with son #3. he is becoming a most interesting man.  this makes me happy.
i am traveling more. next week we are going to houston to visit my twin brother and his wife. we will celebrate our birthday together. a rare occurrence now as we have not lived in the same city or even the same part of the country for at least 25 or 30 years.   this makes me happy.
in august, the husband and i have rented a beach house on the island. a week of serenity waits for us there. the ocean has always called my name and i answer whenever i can.   this makes me happy.
some friends and i are going to the other side of the island in september. a girls weekend. to the place where i believe god lives. we will wander in the rainforests and walk the beaches, eat too much, drink too much and laugh alot. (you can't laugh too much)     this makes me happy.
i "do" lunch with my girlfriends.spending an hour catching each other up on our lives,spilling secrets and sharing bits and pieces of our lives. girlfriend time is important. i sit on front porches and drink coffee or wine depending on the time of day.   this makes me happy.
and so........... i am enjoying a selfish productive retirement and this makes me happy.

if a cow can ride a bicycle.........

so a few days ago, i announced on fb that i got a shiny new bicycle. some of you found this quite amusing.
the husband has decided that i need more exercise. we all know i hate exercise. (dragon boating does not count as you get to sit down while you are doing it.) so okay, i can ride a bike. fooled him!  you get to sit. this works.
so we decide to try out my new bike. on my old bike, i had these great saddle bags (no! not the ones attached to my thighs) i wanted him to attach them to my new bike. why do you need this? he asks. to carry my stuff! my camera, food in case i get hungry, my cigs and my water bottle. first of all he says, we're not going to be gone that long you don't need all that and your water bottle goes in the holder on the cross bar. ummm hello? that's for my coffee cup.
off we go. by the first block i think my head is going to explode cause either my helmet shrunk or my head grew a size or two. so we have to stop so i can adjust it, asked him if i had helmet head yet, he just gave me "the look". fine, helmet fits now, second block my thighs are starting to burn. change gears he says, okay which one is the non thigh burning gear? decide to jay walk(bike) across the street and this car comes out of nowhere burning down the road. dodged that one! by block three, i'm starting to get a bit wobbly. not sure if it was me, the bike or perhaps the couple of glasses of wine i'd had for fortification before we left. time to go home. i suppose we will be doing this again and perhaps i will make it 4 blocks next time!
on a side note- my cousin lorna, puts in several hundred kms every week. she is my new hero!

dreadfull?

i am seriously considering getting dreads.this has been a long time coming,this is not one of my random whims. last fall, the daughter and i were in downtown vancouver shopping. we stopped into a shoe store (surprise!) cause as usual, i had on totally inappropriate footwear and my feet were killing me. in the shoe store was this granny, somewhere in her middle 70's. she had long beautiful grey dreads and to make it even more perfect, she was buying multi-coloured high tops. instantly my hero!
so we got to talking. told the daughter that this may be the solution to my naturally messy hair. except for a few short hours after i leave the hairdresser i always look like i just got out of bed, and not the "just had the best sex of my life" look but rather the "don't you ever comb your hair?" look. it curls and it corkscrews and it frizzes with no thought process as to doing so in a pleasingly symmetrical way. if i had dreads, people would assume that i meant for my hair to look like this.

                                              Johnny Depp has dreads! have i ever mentioned that
                                        we share a birthday? yet another reason for dreads.

two things are stopping me at this point. #1. i would have to stop dying my hair cause i'm pretty sure it's impossible to dye dreads. not sure if i want to let my inner grey out just yet. #2. the husband. he's a tad on the conservative side. he's not on board with this just yet. but everyone knows that i eventually get him to come around to my way of thinking. i have a plan........................

                                                        i will tell him that i will look like this!

so the pros are.. i will not look like i just got out of bed. there's a good chance i will cause a riot at the country club. johnny depp and i will have yet another thing in common.
the cons are... i will have to let my hair go grey. if i don't like it or get bored of it i will have to shave my head.(which is really not a con cause i've been bald before and have a very nice shaped head AND i never had a bad hair day). so the cons are.. i will have to let my hair go grey.
hmmmmm................whaddaya think?

dear mr. policeman

dear mr.policeman;
i would like to take this opportunity to thank you for going out of your way to show me the errors of mine.
thank you for noticing that i had my blinker on and was trying to get out of the HOV lane, which i had no business being in because i drive a gas guzzling SUV all by myself. thank you for noticing that no-one would let me in and that the carpool in front of me was going about 30 km BELOW the speed limit. thank you for following me into the mall and turning on your shiny red light so i would notice you. thank you for understanding that applying lip balm to my cracked lips is not the same as re-applying lipstick while driving.
i just wanted to point out to you that while you were lecturing me, somewhere in the city, a drug deal was going down, some guy was beating up his wife and an old lady was being mugged. i feel bad that i kept you from going after the bad guys because you had to take the time to educate me on gas emissions and the importance of following the rules of the road.
oh! and thank you for not giving me the 2 tickets i so richly deserved.
i am duly chastised.

stand up and be counted

so yesterday i open the mail to find out that i have been selected to participate in the census. crap! i hate all things governmental that smak of big brother. the last time i was selected i had to answer about 400 things pertaining to my private life. i can't quite remember, but i'm pretty sure they asked how many times a week my husband i had sex. so i was ranting and raving and swearing that i wasn't going to do this. the husband calmy pointed out that it was against the law not to do it and i could get arrested. i then remembered that orange is not my colour, so fine, i'll answer their stupid questions.
okay they changed it. they no longer want to know about my sex life. yea! in fact they really don't want to know anything other than
1. how many people live with me
2. our ages
3. what language(s) we speak
4. what our first language was
and that was it! what was the point of this waste of money?
oh! there was one more question. would i consent to having my answers made available to my descendants in 92 years from now. just to be cantankerous i said no. i'm pretty sure my descendants can figure out for themselves that i spoke english.
senseless census!

and justice and freedom for all?

so bin laden is dead.
something is just not sitting right with me. i am not disputing the fact that he was an evil man and deserved to die. what i am disputing is the way that he died.
or did he die? a quick burial at sea? no pictures of the body? when they hung sadam they were pretty quick in publishing the pictures of him and his sons.
there is no substantive evidence that bin laden was responsible for 9/11. he never took credit for it and there is a theory that is was an inside job with out side help. bush liked his wars and was not above starting them (need i mention iraq?)
dancing in the streets! or dancing on a grave? vengeance is not justice.
they "may" have killed bin laden but they have not killed the ideology.
that he was responsible for the deaths of thousands again i do not dispute it but where is the justice in taking him out in a stealth attack? if they knew where he was, why didn't they at least try to take him alive and put him on trial? even sadam had his kangaroo court.
this little charade should guarantee that obama gets re-elected for sure. nothing makes the americans happier than a good old fashioned lynching.
just saying.